The Funeral

When I’ll do it, I’ll do it without mistake.

I shall bear no scars beforehand.

Multiple attempts won’t be needed to me.

If it shall be, it shall be swift and clean.

With the ruthless blade of my indifferent mind.

And it shall be that way only.

No one shall know I existed.

I shall arrive and depart in the same quiet hour.

No one shall see what I don’t want them to see.

No one shall cry and put on a show.

There will be a celebration of my impotence instead.

And I shall remain attendant to loathe everyone who need to be loathed.

I never liked attention and I deem it will be like that always.

My departure will be silent and peace less.

The castles will echo empty, their servants shall run away.

And I’ll be glad that I moved some stones.

The oppressors shall hold their heads forever high.

But there will be guilt brewing inside their hearts.

And like the poison that slowly kills, I shall birth their funerals with it.

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Quote of the day

“I have learned that if you must leave a place that you have lived in and loved and where all your yesteryears are buried deep, leave it any way except a slow way, leave it the fastest way you can. Never turn back and never believe that an hour you remember is a better hour because it is dead. Passed years seem safe ones, vanquished ones, while the future lives in a cloud, formidable from a distance.”

~Beryl Markham

Oblivion Road

I love myself, I do-

Enough to not die, but not enough to live.

I wake up and I walk.

I do all which is necessary.

I do all that’s expected of me.

But I’m empty, there’s no passion in me.

I walk, I breathe and I exist.

I assure you I’m not dead.

Not yet.

But I’m not alive either.

I’m a warrior with least resistance.

I’m a light on the oblivion road.

I’m a gambler of time and hope.

I measure less and less as I grow old.

I walk and watch other people run.

I walk and manage to move no place.

I love myself, I do.

I just don’t like me anymore.

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Human Brain and Individual Uniqueness

The thing with human brain is though the hardware is more or less the same for everyone; the software, the programming isn’t. Unlike a computer, a human brain starts working before it’s fully built. The shaping of an individual depends on his conditioning, experiences and interpretations thereof. Employing relativity and comparing individuals hence therefore is useless; As the emotional and interpretational skeleton of a human brain is formed at a fragile age and is mostly out of a person’s control.

Maybe that’s why parenting becomes so important. Maybe that’s why our system of standardisation and conformity fails so spectacularly at the individual level. Maybe that’s why we feel an inherent urge to rebel against conformity. We must learn to think for ourselves to preserve our special uniqueness. We are not a collection of generic beings. If we were so, our race would never have progressed.

It were always those, who refused to conform, pushed the envelope farthest.

Contentment, peace and semblance of order are the primary objectives of a society; and change can never be achieved through contentment. Such aversion to change is a very dangerous proposition for a race that has managed to survive only by learning to change & adapt. Perhaps that’s where an individual becomes more important than the society. Society needs the courageous few to light ahead the uncertain path of change, so that one day it might cross the same, too.

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Just some unpolished, unstructured thoughts. Take everything you read with a grain of salt. Contradictory views and arguments welcome.

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Quote of the day

“If only we could see the endless string of consequences that result from our smallest actions. But we can’t know better until knowing better is useless.”

~John Green, Looking For Alaska

Quote of the day

“To let oneself be carried on passively is unthinkable.”

~Virginia Woolf

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Being stuck in the passiveness, knowing it’s killing you; and yet being unable to do anything about it is unbearable.